Time to get personal again, that means in English. The last time I wrote a blogpost that was this personal, was a long time ago. Almost 3 years ago. In that post I wrote about my flaw, the fact that I only have half an arm. You can read the entire post here.
Today I am talking about it a little and how Bogilates helped me get my spirit back. So let’s get started!
A few months ago I felt really down. For a few years now, I am trying to get my diploma, but I still don’t have anything. I studied for Primary school teacher (2,5 years), secondary school teacher (half a year), orthopedagogics (half a year) and psychology (1 year). I really loved studying for Primary school teacher, but my French and Math were not good enough to teach it to the kids. I made mistakes, with the result that I failed my internship twice in my second year. That means that you have to wait 3 years if you want to try it again. So I tried different studies without any luck. After half a year of trying psychology, my exam results were awful. I wanted to lock myself up and never come out. I felt like a complete failure *Tear drops from the cheek*. So even though I was still registered for the other part of the year, I started going less and less to my classes. Untill I finally didn’t go anymore. There were nights when I cried myself to sleep. For the next month or so, I pushed myself more in a dark hole. I felt not only like a failure in my studies, it started to get personal. I started to hate myself, my body, my mind, my life. *Ok, really need to stop my tears right now* Untill one day I was sick of it. I knew this couldn’t be my life anymore. I had to come out of this negativity.
How did I get out? Well, I am following Blogilates on Facebook/Youtube for a long time now. I’ve started and stopted with the beginners calendar a few times. But I knew I had to start somewhere. So I started with my self image. That was something I lost last, so I thought that that was what I needed to get back first. For you guys out there who don’t know her, her name is Cassey Ho and she is a POP Pilates instructor. When you watch one of her videos, you instantly become infected with her positivity. She is so nice and lights up your day. I told myself to just do it! Don’t think, just do. Don’t think about the times you failed at anything and just go! And that is what I did. I started working out 6 days a week and after 2 weeks I started to see results. That was when I knew I was no longer a failure. I started to feel good again. My energy level was up and my eating started to get healthier too.
After 4 weeks I finished the calendar. Something I have never accomplished before. It felt amazing! In one video, (don’t remember wich one), she had a quote:
Don’t let other people’s accomplishments, be your failures.
And that really spoke to me. Because I did the opposite. I saw my friends graduate, finding jobs, getting married and even having kids. While I hadn’t accomplished anything. So I am trying to take her advise and so far so good.
Sometimes it was hard to stick with it. Because of my disability, I had to find ways to do exercises. So to lengthen my arm I use a rung (I don’t really know if that is the right word for it, but the picture speaks for me) with a piece of a flexible yoga matt taped on it to make it more enjoyable to lean on.
When you are working out with her, she sometimes asks you what you are wearing on your nails, (and you guys know how much I like nails),so to end this note, I want to thank her by doing a manicure of her new Mermaid collection she designed. It’s super beautiful, feminine and elegant. (If you click on the picture, you will see the complete collection)
-Start of with a base coat and a base color. I used a very light, almost white purple.
-With a sponge I randomly dabt on a purple color (830 Hema), a light blue color (838 Hema), a mint color (53 You Belong To Me), a pink color (55 be awesome tonight) and a white color (38 Hema).
-With a small paintbrush I painted triangles on the bottom of the nails.
The only thing you need to do is apply a top coat to seal in your design and make it shine.
Thank you for listening to me and see you next time!